Conversations

What do you do when you've had a blah conversation with someone?

Do you run after them or call them back and start all over again?

Do you sit and imagine a better conversation between the two of you in your head?

Do you decide to never speak to the person again, thus eliminating the chance of another blah conversation?

Do you try to convince yourself that it wasn't that bad?

I hate blah conversations.
You feel like you're speaking every cliche in the book. You feel like you are just spitting out words with no control over what they are and knowing that they will not be absorbed but just blown away with the wind. You feel like your mouth is saying one thing but your heart and your mind are saying another.

Where's the fine line between being polite and just contributing to a blah conversation? This is why it's hard to meet new people. Because every conversation with a new person starts out blah. Then most of the time it never goes deeper. Say you do go deeper. Now you know the person's name and interests and maybe a personal value. You feel closer, comfortable, like a friend; so you stop there. All your conversations are comfortable and surfacy. In my book that's still blah.

It's like the age old phrase, "How are you doing today?" or "How's your day been?" Most of the time people don't really care. You know it and they know it so you give a blah answer like "fine" or "good." And they accept it. Never mind that if the conversation went deeper they may hear the joys and thrills of your day or the despairs and struggles of your day. That's too uncomfortable (hearing either the good or the bad).

I do it too.

"How's your day?"
I don't really want to know and I don't really want to share.
So I find myself having blah conversations, which I hate.

Then again...
You can't have no conversation with people. If the only conversation you plan to have with people is a deep and fulfilling one, there won't be many opportunities to speak much. Which comes across as stand-offish and unloving. So we have the blah conversations while we sort out who to go deep with.


So what do you do when you've had a blah conversation with someone you want to go deep with?

You run after them or call them back and start all over again.

I think I'll try this.