Being Slothful

You ever have one of those days when you don't feel like doing anything?
Your alarm goes off at 9:00am, you reset it for 9:30, and then fall into a slumber that lasts until early afternoon. You wake up realizing it's late but can't seem to pull yourself out of bed so you just sit there thinking, partly because you're tired, partly because you are not sure you want to face what's left of the day. When you finally do drag yourself out of bed you do so with the utmost intention of "accomplishing something today!" But instead you sit, you read, you watch TV, all the while counting the passing hours on the clock until it's too late to go out, too late to have company, too late to be awake...too late to do anything.
Ever have one of those day? Or two? Or a week?

Now I've had to ask the Lord a number of times as I wasted yet another day, "Why am I doing this when I know I have bills to pay, very little cash, and no job?" At first I knew it was tiredness. Spending a month 'holidaying' with family and travelling all over the North Island of New Zealand is tiring. It took a couple of days just to recover from that. But then the thought began to creep into my head that I was avoiding something. I was dreading the impending job search. I hate searching for jobs. I hate going from store to store asking if they are hiring. I hate waiting for a response once an application is turned in. I hate interviewing. I was being lazy to avoid the inevitable.

So...

Today I walked to town, and attempted to inquire about jobs. Many places aren't hiring quite yet while others are already hiring for their Christmas staff. (Yes, NZ has already started to advertise for Christmas.) And so many places are still out there where I wouldn't want to work at all. Ugh! It's hard to be motivated for anything that isn't theater.

I'm trying Lord. I'm trying.